That’s right. You read correctly. I completed every avo-lover’s dream yesterday and went to Amsterdam’s greatest cultural, political, culinary, philosophical hotspot… THE AVOCADO SHOW.
Where the walls are green, the staff are keen and the food is lean. Yes, this place has been on my bucket list ever since it was established in the last year and no it did not disappoint. I will now proceed to inform you fully of my experience to heaven on earth….
9.40am: The Long Journey.
I feel that with such a magical endpoint, the journey should also be of some importance. We left our hostel in central Amsterdam and embarked on the trek that would seem like a lifetime but was, in reality, 600m down the road. The journey may have been short but by no means uneventful. Many zebra crossings were crossed, many tourists were spotted and nearly all of us, at some point, had a near-death experience with a local on a bike.
I even spotted a local pub being stocked up with Heineken from a truck (I have absolutely no idea if this is what was happening but take a look at the photo below and make up your mind).
9.48am: The Arrival
Our arrival at the show was of great anticipation – surprisingly. I don’t think any of my friends understood why I was crying or why I had my breasts out ready for the chef to sign (jokes, I like avo but I’m not a weirdo – although I did cringily ask for a coffee cup as a souvenir). Nevertheless when my photographer friend Charlotte offered to take my photo outside the cafe I jumped, in fact I launched, at the opportunity.
9.53am – The Grand Entrance
Yes we did spend 5 minute taking photos outside and no I’m not sorry. We then entered. One foot in front of the other I closed my eyes as I step into the establishment. I sighed as I breathed in the avo-goodness. Resisting all temptation to pull out every avocado pun I knew at that point (“I hope you avo good day” “You avo lovely seating arrangement in here” “I’ll need to do some avo-cardio after this meal!”), I joined my friends at our table.
9.55am – Anna’s Choice
A happy, avo-loving waitress came over to our table and handed us our menus (whilst I was inwardly trying to contain my jealousy for her job). The menu…where do I start….avo-snacks, avo-beverages, avo-salads, avo-floral arrangements….safe to say I was avo-ing a good time (aware of the poorness of that pun). With bated breath I chose ‘The Avo Rose’ – An avocado rose served on toast and I selected humous as my topping (of course).
10:02am – First Up
Although the wait for food was short, it was nonetheless agonising. However pretty soon the avosmoothie my friend Rachel had ordered, arrived at our table looking fancy as hell. Don’t let its darkish ogre green colour deter you – this was delicious! It had banana, coconut water, avocados (amongst other lovelies) and tasted da bomb.
10:07am – Love at first sight
You know in fairy tales where the prince and princess look into each others’ eyes for the first time and fall madly in love, this was basically what happened when my Avo Rose arrived at the table. Its beauty outshone any avocado I’d ever eaten before, its colouring was vibrant, its arrangement was neat and uniform, it was lying seductively on a perfectly toasted slice of brown bread with a thick duvet of humousy goodness and topped with (what we can only hope was) edible flowers. If there is a more instagrammable food out there I want to see it, my love was brighter than any smoothie bowl, fruit arrangement or overnight oats that had ever plagued my feed before and witnessing it in the flesh was another experience altogether.
10:12am – Brains and beauty
So after 5 minutes of various photo angles, selfies, sniffing, touching and frankly hesitancy at breaking its outer beauty, I decided I’d better actually try the damn thing (partly because by this point both of my friends had almost finished and were staring me in disbelief at my emotion over a piece of toast). I cut the moist bread, selected a single petal and tried the goodness. Safe to say that my hopes and dreams had not been counteracted by the taste. Yes it was clear that this meal had both brains and beauty. Soon the food was no more and all that remained was a full tummy and a longing to repeat the experience again and again and again.
10:30am – Adieu!
Twentyish minutes later and we’re paying up (note: they don’t accept cash only card) and gathering our bits and bobs and memories of this avoperience. I sigh a great sigh of longing and misery – how can it be over so soon?! I knew my time with my love had come to an end and I had to accept this.
I stepped out into the humid air and walked back down the street, knowing that it wouldn’t be the last time The Avocado Show and I would meet.
Seriously though here are a few tips for making your experience da bomb:
- You can’t book and if they’re busy you’ll be put on a waiting list. The best time to go is in the morning on a weekday.
- Bring your cards – they don’t take cash pavement,
- Enjoy yourself! Its an experience but its also beautiful! Make sure every moment counts!